Tuesday, August 10, 2004
It's a scorching hot Atlanta morning in the summer of 1984 and Dan is feeling terrible. A couple of guys from work decided to grab a beer after work the day before, and before he knew it, Dan had passed out on his couch, apparently having spent some time the previous night unsuccessfully trying to get the pornographic channels unscrambled on his new 'cable' TV thingy. Dan is late for work, and totally unprepared for the big meeting this morning with the head of marketing.
The bosses have been all over Dan's R&D group for the past couple months. The hard-charging boys from Dallas have been gaining market share and today was the big day for everyone to put forward their best ideas for turning the company around. Dan had nothing. He had intended to spend the previous evening brainstorming for the nugget that would save his job, if not the company, but one beer turned into ten, and now he was totally screwed.
Everyone is tense as they file into the long conference room. The division head calls the meeting to order and Dan sinks down in his chair hoping that the meeting runs long and has to adjourn before he gets called to present. This particular manager is gruff and has been known to fire people on the spot, and everyone in the room is nervously playing with their notes.
"Dan, why don't you start us off with some of your ideas for fixing this mess."
Un-friggin-believable. Dan sheepishly walks towards the front of the room looking everywhere for inspiration. He passes the stupid fruit platter they always set up at these meetings. Why do they put cherries on those things, he thinks to himself. Then you have to sit there like an ass and spit out the pits in front of everyone.
Dan is at the head of the conference table and 30 guys are waiting for him to say something brilliant. The pause is getting a bit long, and Dan knows he has to say something fast, or it's going to get weird. Looking around the room one last time, he opens his mouth and says the first thing that comes to his mind...
"Why don't we make a cherry Coke?"
The bosses have been all over Dan's R&D group for the past couple months. The hard-charging boys from Dallas have been gaining market share and today was the big day for everyone to put forward their best ideas for turning the company around. Dan had nothing. He had intended to spend the previous evening brainstorming for the nugget that would save his job, if not the company, but one beer turned into ten, and now he was totally screwed.
Everyone is tense as they file into the long conference room. The division head calls the meeting to order and Dan sinks down in his chair hoping that the meeting runs long and has to adjourn before he gets called to present. This particular manager is gruff and has been known to fire people on the spot, and everyone in the room is nervously playing with their notes.
"Dan, why don't you start us off with some of your ideas for fixing this mess."
Un-friggin-believable. Dan sheepishly walks towards the front of the room looking everywhere for inspiration. He passes the stupid fruit platter they always set up at these meetings. Why do they put cherries on those things, he thinks to himself. Then you have to sit there like an ass and spit out the pits in front of everyone.
Dan is at the head of the conference table and 30 guys are waiting for him to say something brilliant. The pause is getting a bit long, and Dan knows he has to say something fast, or it's going to get weird. Looking around the room one last time, he opens his mouth and says the first thing that comes to his mind...
"Why don't we make a cherry Coke?"
